bummed would be an understatement of how i feel, and felt the last 36 hours. i hope it doesnt last much longer.

one fight shouldn't change the effort. things were fine before. one fight shouldn't change that. especially a petty fight, not even worthy of fighting.
i just want to be loved the way i deserve to be loved and i want to love you the way you deserve to be love. only fair. do not be discourage and change the way things were. we moving in the right direction..a better direction. we werent quite there but we were on the way.



on another note, i find people to be so disrespectful of others. i hate seeing it and i wish i could do something about it, but sometimes its better for me to mind my own business.

ive been wanting to go out more lately, be more social. the only time i ever go out is when i go to church or work. sometimes a hang out here and there...but im mostly home studying. i guess i have to deal with this because this is my life as of now. i keep telling me that its worth it and staying on top of my class is as well. plus, the people who go out all the time dont have my course load or my goals. each to their own. sometimes i envy it and want to take the easy road and be lazy. but my future looks better than jeopardizing it now and not having that future. however, i do want to go out a little more.

this time of the year is typically my favorite time of the year but lately im dreading it because im not sure what ill be doing. i love this time of the year and i want someone and some people to share that excitement with me. its looking really bleak.