without the risk of being let go, being held means nothing.

..and then, as if the constant power struggle weren’t enough on it’s own, we had made decisions that had push us back even further. decisions that leave us out in the cold when we both know what kind of warmth we’re missing on the inside. to me, there’s more to you than the eye meets but i can’t and probably will never be able to fully drop the guard i keep so well preserved. well for now, im a work in progress its a goal im trying to reach so desperately. you tell me to fold but trust me, this is a good hand.. i was born with a cloudy head but perfect vision, and i know everything there is to know about just a few things. while you tell me to forget it all, i am quite apprehensive yet i know youre it.through this all, this is what i want. new. new for us. i learn that you’re one of the few things i know everything about. now you should fold. because i’m all in.
im taking these moments as an opportunity, not to make you mine,
but to make myself
yours. im yours. :)

i will love you regardless of what you do.
until you do it.
to me.


i am hopeful, for the first time in months.
you're making me incredibly happy. its nice to have more good days then bad.
doubt you read this; but if you do.... i love you.



love.love.love.